A metaphoric roller coaster of course, because the PNE is closed.
Everything has happened over this christmas break. In one day, I decided that I wanted to go back to school and do my masters. I went and got a grad check, bought my books and my wonderful husband bought me a new orphaned kitten. That was Friday the 21st of December. Took a break for Christmas Eve, Christmas and visiting family. Then in another day, I decided that school is really not what I want to do (it is simply the default button of our generation) and that we really need to pursue our dreams - which is to seek out land, start a permaculture school and truely live as close to the earth as possible. That was yesterday, the 27th of December.
From the outside, it looks like we have no idea what we are doing and that we are trying to figure it out by bouncing from idea to idea. This could be, but I think we know exactly what to do, we just have to trust that we have the knowledge, courage and stability to pull it off. Essentially there are two avenues we could take. We stay here, live in the city and continue doing what we are doing - activism in the community, start an arts co-op, build community gardens. Or, we move to some plot of land, figure out how to live sustainably and then teach it to others. The vision Justin had in reference to the former was of being a Lemming getting pulled off of a cliff with a bunch of other lemmings. Whether we are part of the problem, or neck deep in the problem, its going to effect us in a major way. On the contrary, the latter means that we are taken care of - we know how to live and get what we need without having to depend on society as it currently exists to survive. With this security, we can effectively teach others allowing the proverbial cup to overflow, so to speak. This way, no matter what hits, peak oil, earthquake, food security issues, global warming, we have what we need and we are doing our part to help it out.
I have realized on this weeks roller coaster that we manifest things quickly. How can anyone decide what they want and need in one day, the last friday before the christmas break and end up being able to get an appointment for a grad check? I also realize that given the right motivation, skills and knowledge can be aquired nearly instantly, especially when we are working together. (I can’t tell you the level of synergy that Justin and I quckly attain when we are working on the same project.)
So, we know what we want, we are ready and open to recieving it, however we are meant to